Accidental Happiness

and she traveled through the night

for so long the glimmer of sunshine 

shocked her head and heart


had she not been frozen with fear

she would have run back into the 

darkness for it was at least 

something she knew well.


Then all at once her shoulders dropped

she stood tall and breathed deep

and stepped into the light

unafraid.


J.Lyn
August 1st, 2016

 

July 17th, 2014 It’s all about accountability.

Today

woke up around 7:30am had a glass of water and a not quite a cup of coffee.

snuggled with my kids (in the perfect world that burns A LOT of calories)

at 9:30am I began Jillian Micheal’s “Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism” – a 40 minute workout (and boy, oh boy, am I glad I didn’t know that before I put the DVD in or it may have never happened).

now it’s 10:25am and I am feeling positively… happy.  I forgot this feeling of arm jello, ab soreness, wobbly leg giddiness. This sensation of “It IS going to be worth it!” and  “I can SO do this!”

I followed this up with an organic lemon cut in half and squeezed into room temp water.

 

Onto a busy day,  but at this rate – I may walk to work today just because I feel that great!!

My thought to hold on to today…

Do every action with full intention!

 

Thanks for sticking with me!

~J.Lyn

Tips from the Classroom for HOME MANAGEMENT

Winds are blowing… as they always do.  At this time in Education there is negativity that is associated with “discipline in the classroom” and instead the emphasis is on Classroom Management.

This led me to spend some time thinking about Home Management.  Before we delve in, I want to make something perfectly clear:

If you are a parent who is searching for help and feeling like a failure or feeling like your methods are failing, please take a moment to remind yourself that there is no such thing as perfect and as long as you are seeking answers and asking questions – you are on the right track!

It is so important I am going to say it again, but this time pay attention:  There is no such thing as perfect and I hope you are not expecting that of yourself OR your child(ren)!

Now that we have that clear, let’s talk about this negativity surrounding “discipline”  because as a Mom – at first I was like… “say what?? Sometimes there is no other way!”

But then I thought about it.  Is taking away privileges a form of discipline or is it management?  Is doling out a consequences- management or discipline?  First I had to think about what I considered consequences.  In our house, we have a system  (that I am getting to) that makes consequences really easy – the bottom line is no electronics.  Yep – all. of. it. There is no “step 1: take away the ipod.  step 2 take away tv.” (I tried it – it didn’t work for us because I flat out couldn’t remember if all of them had been good and if not at what level had they had something taken away >insert headache here<.  So back to it – simple rule=no electronics and despite the clarity in which I described to my children the consequence of  no electronics – they always seem surprised and always ask, “Is that the __<insert tv, wii, ipod, etc)___too?”  You have noticed by now (most likely) my use of the word – “consequence” versus “punishment” – I know awfully picky right?  When I was growing up they were one and the same.  But times have changed and after I thought about it – they are completely different words.  Punishments are a form of Discipline. Punishment is spankings, belts, rulers, kneeling by the fridge, going to bed without dinner (which was sometimes really a reward).   A consequence is a result of action or behavior.  It teaches kids for every action there is a reaction.  Good or bad.  But –  you kind of want to steer for the good because it makes life easier and more fun!

 

Where the rules stem from:

Well you see, when my first child was delivered by the stork out of the sky dropped a “How to” book for raising children.  HA!

Seriously, when my children started Preschool I asked about the four signs they seemed to have everywhere.  These signs read: “walking feet, ” “inside voices,” “teachers touch the door,” and ” listening ears.”

Now I guess that has blossomed into 7 taught in the classroom:  “hands to self,” “inside voice,” “walking feet,” “working hard,” “quiet hand up,” “eyes on teacher”, and “listening ears.”

Makes sense right?  That is rhetorical people -Right. My initial intention was that if we had similar rules at home – my kids would be used to the expectations at school and do better… or at least stay out of trouble.  It worked!

My System:

The rules of our household follow closely the Classroom Management Basic Rules and the PBIS -Positive Behavior Interventions and Support.  The may seem vague at first – but just wait!

#1.  Be safe.  This covers a lot of ground right?  No running, no pushing, no fighting, no horsing around, don’t leave the house alone, don’t talk to strangers, and on and on and on!  When your children are doing something, just ask, “Is that safe?  It isn’t “No this” and “No that” or “You are breaking the rules!!”  It is a simple question they must learn to ask themselves!! I have enclosed the printout I made – together we sat down and went into further detail -that is why the clouds are so big!  I asked, “So what does being safe mean?”  They answered, “no running, no fighting,” etc – and we wrote these responses into the extra space of the cloud.

#2. Be helpful.  Again covering a ton of ground: clean up after yourself, etc.  All of my children since age 4 have put there dishes in the dishwasher after a meal.  After age 11 they do their own laundry.  They always are responsible to keep toys picked up and they have to put their dirty clothes in the hamper (not on the floor).  After being in the bathroom for a shower or to get ready they must make sure they clean up after themselves.   This is all part of being helpful.

#3. Be Kind.  This means no fighting, no racing, please hold doors open, and maybe say nice things to each other, and yes, share your toys.  As they get older it means no bullying, stand up for others, do not take friendship for granted – make sure friends know they are cared for and family knows they are loved.  An unexpected place this helped us out was at the dinner table.  We always affirmed just trying things.  No forced , “Finish your plate!” but still we encountered resistance based on appearance or newness.  One night after an exhausting battle,  “just try a mushroom – you might like it!” *epic fail* my littlest one piped up and said, “it’s not nice to not try what Mom made.”  Genius!  At the thought of not having electronics all over a bite of mushroom the child caved.  No food favorite was developed- he still hated mushrooms.  He made a hysterical face that had everyone in peels of laughter.  And food trials were no longer a trial here.

So – here is the blank template:

House Rules

After the first month of having it titled “Our House Rules” – I decided it applied to life – so I changed it “Our Life Rules.”

 

Now – how do you track their behavior??  How do you remember if they have been naughty or nice?  Well – remember “KISS”?

Keep

It

Simple

Silly!

We follow that.

Here is the calendar that hangs in our house.  It is right next to the rules.  If all of them have followed the rules – they get a smiley face.  If ANY of them broke a rule – they get a frown face.  (I caution you against using “warnings” – these are simple life rules.  They will catch on quick!!  My kids help each other to keep the smile faces going!)  The calendar tracks the day and they must have 5 smiley faces in a row in order to have electronics!  So if they break a rule – it is 5 days no electronics if they correct the behavior and keep on top of the others.  So when one is naughty they all get punished???  That isn’t fair?!  Life isn’t fair.  We are family – we stick together and help each other make life easier.  At first the other kids got upset, but since they have all been at fault they are not (as) hard on each other.  Instead, there has been this really great self dedication to family helping family!  Which is another great life lesson.

Here is the calendar (basic template available in Word – snazz it up all you want!):

kids behavior calendar

DISCLAIMER:  This is not going to work for everyone!   I had rule sheets upon rule sheets before deriving this set up and who knows? in a year it might not work for us any longer!  You have to be able to adjust.  You have to be able to change (another GREAT life lesson!) and TALK to your kids!!! about it.  “”Boy, that really didn’t work for us – did it?  Let’s think of something that might work better…”   Golden TIP:  Ask a teacher!!  There is NO ONE that understands the lack of guidebook better than a teacher!!  They might have something that will work for you and yours!

This also teaches kids you don’t just give up if something doesn’t work – you find something else and ask for help!

There was a week for me that sh!t hit the fan and I knew my kids had broken the rules – but I couldn’t remember when or what.  I sat them down and said, “Hmmm.  Things have been really crazy haven’t they?  We lost track of our days and sometimes our rules haven’t we?   How about we start with today and see how things go?”  Their behavior back on track, smiley faces abound – we recovered.   Life happens people!  Teach kids how to move on from it!

This also prevents the hanging on of past mistakes.   Every month a new clean slate is printed and posted.  Focus is on the desired behavior.  Responsibility is theirs.  They are their own people – it is my job to make sure they are good people.

Also – no frowny face for behavior issues at school.  The school has their own consequences.  No doubling up! Now my daughter once fibbed about having homework done.  The next day I got an email from her teacher who was concerned that said homework was not done.  When talking to her she said she thought she could get it done in her morning study hall so “no big deal” but then she forgot about it.  We explained, it is not kind, safe or helpful to lie to parent(s) = frown face.  She individually got an extra 5 days of no electronics because we wanted the message to be loud and clear – lie not to your parents, ever.

Another note – it puts electronic devices where they belong too – a benefit. A desire.  NOT a NEED.  The days my kids CAN play electronics – they often don’t.  They are too busy outside or playing playdoh or drawing or singing, etc.  But the consequence still works because what if they want to play it and they can’t?!   >gasp!< also – when starting out make them earn electronics!!  Five straight days of smiley faces!!  Remember it is a privilege not a right!!  This is how you redefine it for your kids. (and when we lost our place – we began again as well.)

I, like you, I’m just doing the best I can.  Like most things in life  -things improve faster if you put your heads together – so if you have ideas please share!!

~J.Lyn

 

 

Saturday, August 17th, 2013 *Core Walking

So today I managed to get up and get moving right away.  Snuck out leaving my hubby to fend for himself with our kiddos, lol!  Starting walking and was just so entranced by my surroundings I never did make it to a jog/run, but taking your time with something has its advantages as well.  While I was walking, Jillian popped into my head talking about punches.

Now for those of you who have seen or done her 30 day or watching TBL, this move is one in which you sit down in a squat position (getting as low as you can) and then punch it out, left, right, left, right, “time your breathing with your punches” (you hear her now don’t you  🙂

So anyway as I am walking, I try just small, very controlled punches to the rhythm of my walking.

And I notice the feeling in my abs.

my abs!

By adding this small movement to my walk, my heart rate was up in the ‘weight loss’ range and I was really feeling it!

Side benefit:  it made me feel strong!

So definitely going to add this in when I am at home walking!!

~J.Lyn

Friday, August 16th, 2013 *VACATION!

Vacation
All I ever wanted
Vacation
Had to get away

Sorry it’s been stuck in my head all week and now that I am here, well now it’s just cause to sing it!

So in preparation for this weekend away, I am trying to think of the nights that I walked/ran.

Last Sunday I did the Color Run

Tuesday I walked with my daughter.

Wednesday I did a 5K in my neighborhood.

Thursday we packed and ran around like chickens with our heads cut off (that counts as exercise, right?!)

But in all seriousness, now that we are here and unpacked we swam for awhile, we had dinner and then the ladies left the gentlemen with the kids at a playground and we went for a shorter walk – I would guess a mile or so.  It was still good to get out and move around!

Tomorrow I am hoping to sneak in my 5K, but I am certain that there will be hours of swimming on the books!

 

Daily Reminder:  It is a lifestyle.  This means daily changes.  Even if they are small things!  A short walk each day.  Swimming.  Jogging.  Laughing and just trying to eat better foods more often during the day!!

 

Enjoy life in a way that will enable you to enjoy life longer!!!

 

~J.Lyn

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

So yesterday I didn’t slack I just didn’t get on here – I snagged my daughter and went for a walk.  It was beautiful out!

 

Tonight I completed my 5K route and am loving life and myself! Eating much better – sticking to my calorie count. I find it really helps to buy fruit, clean it and portion it right into smaller tupper ware containers – then I can just snag one when I need to eat!!  This works for carrots and other veggies as well!

My new favorite saying:

Life is about Progress, not Perfection!!

~J.Lyn

 

What is your progress today?

 

Sunday, August 11th, 2013

Feeling Stressed?  Work have you overloaded?  Feeling like your house work or work is a never-ending?

I can not gush enough about how I feel The Color Run completely dissipated my stress!!!   Every person should do this once a year!

Do a Color Run, Lose your Stress!!
Do a Color Run, Lose your Stress!!

They gave away a ton of stuff during the race and after!

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The stage set up prior to the big finale celebration and the walk to the event location

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Next time – we definitely want to get there early *EARLY* to be some of the first to go!  We ended up being in the very last group to go…

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Nothing is weird here.  No one is too big or too small to run.  No one is dressed too crazy or not crazy enough.  There was a guy who painted himself white who we could not find at the end of the race – but I bet it was a fun sight to see!!  The bride I looked for as well and couldn’t see.  There were lots of fun socks, wigs and tutus!!

As I type this I am planning to do another and it occurs to me that I would love to do this with…. EVERYONE I know!  It was so much fun!!

After finally getting home from the long drive, I grabbed the hubby and dragged him out for another walk.  I had to stretch my legs after being crammed in the car.  We made a fabulous decision… to drop cable.  We need internet, but we both know that the distraction that is tv we could do without!

Have you made any decisions recently to try to tame your life??  What worked / or didn’t?

~J.Lyn

Simple Happiness

Simple Happiness

Look carefully and you will see the smiles carefully folded in the colors

Tuesday, Aug 6th, 2013 **Fit Stat Update**

Walgreen’s Steps :  3.17 mi (6,340 steps)
Anytime Fitness  0
Other WO:  0
My fitness pal ~ calories logged :  x
Logged all of above in my Blog!!  x

 

And here is an update on my fitness stats!

8/6/2013
Weight 179.2  -3.8
Waist  42.25  -1.0
Hips  43.25  -.25
Chest  39  -.50
Right Arm  12  0
Left Arm  12  0
Right Thigh  23  -2.0
Left Thigh  24  -1.0
Body Fat %

I have done Jillian’s 30 day shred 6 times in the last 14 days.

12 days of walking leaves me at a total of 34.42 miles.

diet:  I have been trying to drink 1 liter of water before I have anything else in the morning (this is suppose to aid in digestion and hydration).  I have also cut sugar out of my coffee by subbing in honey. I limit myself to two cups of coffee all day.  1 glass of milk (I know this should be more).  Then all water.   I have also really been trying to eat breakfast.   I am not always successful, but I am getting better about it.  Still tracking in my fitness plan for calorie intake.

 

This has resulted in a loss of 4.75″ and I am down 3.8 lbs!!!

So my goals for the next two weeks are:

  • to walk 10 days of the 14 for a total of 31.7 miles
  • to complete 12/14 days of JM’s 30 day shred.

I will complete a fit stats sheet in two weeks again * See you then!

~J.Lyn

 

 

Saturday, July 27th, 2013

Started the day out with Jillian.

 

I think this is one of the biggest tips I can give others:

when you wake – get your workout clothes on (before you have time to think about it). Pop in that DVD and push play.  I get a glass of water while the intro goes so I am not standing there thinking of all the reason I don’t want to do this.  🙂  I also grab a pen to write down on the following home-made calendar that I did this workout (leaves me no option, lol).

SAMSUNG

Once I pushed play the only thought I let into my brain was that it was Saturday and we had a ton of things to do so I had better make this workout count.

It was still really hard, but I can definitely tell a difference in my ability from day 1!  Which of itself makes me happy!

Very excited to discover my own stats at the end of week 1!!!   Are you here with me?  I hope so, cause this is gonna be good!

Walgreen’s Steps :  0
Anytime Fitness  0
Other WO:  Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred  Day 5 on the books!!
My fitness pal ~ calories logged :  yes
Logged all of above in my Blog!!  check!

So ready to see the results as I chip away towards my goals! How are you doing?

~J.Lyn