So I am watching ABC and they are acting as if Mean Girls as young as Preschool and Kindergarten are something new. They have even mentioned that perhaps blame should be placed on technology, something about the lack of interaction….. And here are a few more quick quotes:
“We are seeing it more and more”
“weird perfect storm”
I cry bullshit.
Little Mean Girls are not a new phenom. It isn’t happening any more than it used to. People are calling attention to it more using forums like Facebook and Twitter. It is harder for the Prom queen to get away treating everyone like crap because it is easier for kids to rally together against it. But walk into any small town – any classroom in that town – and you can talk to the kids about the classroom hierarchy. One that is based off of the hierarchy the adults have exampled for the children their whole life. If you are shaking your head “no” then you are part of the shitty hierarchy the children follow.
If we as a society had ANY desire to change it we would stand in front of the mirror and make the changes there.
But I digress, ABC hosts practically sang the words “Teach them to be kind… yes, yes, be kind!” Like the wrapping up of the Disney story.
Don’t get me wrong I think most people have the best intention to teach their children to be kind, but then there are the “but”s.
“But you are strong and independent and that you shouldn’t change.”
“But you shouldn’t be ashamed that people like you and not her.”
The one that I believe is used MOST often: “But kids will be kids”
If you have said these things – there is a very good chance not only is your child the Mean Kid, but YOU are probably the Mean Adult.
So I bring this up, not because I am going to tell you how we should be or what we should do, but because I think often we don’t face the reality of situations. It comes in handy to blame technology because then the newscasters could not possibly have been mean kids. (Though I bet of the four that were onscreen, at least 3 of them were.) It comes in handy because then we don’t have to analyze the history or the responsibility WE carry – we can just sweep reality under the carpet and act as if these are NEW problems.
And this is why I am frustrated enough to write about it.
There is nothing new here. This has been going on since the first classroom, no, from the first settlement probably. Well – as much as I like the sarcasm of that statement – I can only vouch for the 90’s and on. When I was in grade school, I remember overhearing a teacher tell a student, “All this will be nothing as soon as you get to high school. That is where kids start growing up and maturing, The childish name calling will stop.”
Lies! Lies, I tell ya!
It didn’t stop – it just reflected the image of society better. You had the smokers, the jocks, the preppies, the priss- I mean princesses. You had the nerds, which were different than the smart/rich/good-looking kids who would just be termed “Academics” For every Homecoming or Prom court – no matter how big or small – minus off ONE and only one child, the rest of them = mean kids. There is always one refreshing NICE kid that got voted in because he or she is just KIND. But I would say that’s probably it.
Perhaps before the 90’s – there was a transformation in high school. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm………….. Can anyone lead credence to this? Please comment!
But to continue:
The question we have to ask is – do we have any real desire to change it or do we admit that this is how our society and yes how our classrooms function and put the focus on giving our children the tools to deal with it?
How do you deal with the mean kids? the bullies? – – -Don’t pretend they are not out there. They are.
What are your thoughts? I would love to round table this…. without the blinders on. Schools, taxpayers pay thousands of dollars on “Anti-Bullying” campaigns. Are we in the right mind set for any campaign to be effective? Share away!